Lebowski Fest 2009

It's kind of funny that I've become such a fan of The Big Lebowski. I can remember seeing it when it first came out in March of 1998. I was in my last semester of college. The most recent Coen Brothers film was Fargo (1996). As with their more recent No Country for Old Men, Fargo was an Oscar darling. It was nominated for a bunch of trophies and won two: Best Original Screenplay (written by both brothers) and Best Actress for Frances McDormand (Joel Coen's wife). As you can imagine, hope for their follow-up was high.

As with their No Country follow-up, however (2008's Burn After Reading), their follow-up to Fargo sort of caught everyone off-guard. From what I recall, most critics weren't really sure what to make of The Big Lebowski. I think Entertainment Weekly gave it a B- or something. I never did see Fargo when it first came out, by the way, but I did catch it on video before it won those Oscars. And much later, in 2004, I caught an AFI screening of it at the ArcLight Hollywood. Nope, The Big Lebowski was the first Coen Brothers movie I saw on the silver screen.

I have to admit that, like the critics, I walked out of the theater a bit befuddled. For starters, I wasn't entirely clear what the plot was. Who exactly scammed whom? Was Bunny really in on it? Or was she a complete innocent? I don't want to say too much about the story threads I hadn't originally caught onto for fear of spoiling it for those who've somehow managed to miss it. Anyway, however underwhelmed I was, I could still recognize the Coens as a unique voice. Ever since then, whenever they've come out with a new flick, regardless of the reviews, I always see it in the theater. O Brother, Where Art Thou? and their remake of The Ladykillers with Tom Hanks are two that come to mind between Lebowski and now. And I suppose No Country was decent. Honestly, I don't see what all the fuss was about. I hated the ending. I never read the Cormac McCarthy novel, but I understand the brothers hewed closely to it. Which makes me wonder why they'd make it at all. But I guess they saw a lot of photographic potential. I have to admit the photography was pretty terrific. But in the end it's all about the story, right?

Back to the Dude. After seeing Lebowski in the theater in March of '98, I didn't see it again until December 2005 when my mom got it for me for Christmas. She got it because I included it on the wish list I e-mailed her a few weeks earlier. As to what would prompt me to ask for it out of the blue after seven years? I can't quite remember. I think The Ladykillers was the Coens' most recent movie at that time. That's one of the few remakes that actually worked. I really enjoyed it. And/or perhaps I was feeling nostalgic for my college days, as 2005 was not a very good year for me. Perhaps I was trying, however futilely, to escape into my more innocent and carefree past. That's kind of hilarious because my college days were really neither of those things. Most folks' aren't, but most folks like to think they were.

Anyway, I asked my mom to get me The Big Lebowski on DVD for Christmas of '05. We watched it together at her place. I'm not sure what she thought of it. She'd never seen it before. Me? I understood the plot and appreciated the film in general much more than I did originally. Of course I was much older (and allegedly wiser) than the last time I'd seen it.

Six months or so later, my father came out to visit me in L.A. I forced him to watch it with me. It was the first time I'd seen it since Christmas. I liked it even more the third time. And then what do you know? Later that same summer the ArcLight Hollywood put on a Monday night screening of Lebowski as part of their annual Party ArcLight deal. Obviously I went. This was now my third time seeing Lebowski in eight months. And I was seeing it on the big screen for the first time in over eight years. It was a terrific experience, as seeing a great movie in a sold-out theater always is. For starters, you had the Dude fans who are really hardcore. They show up wearing those big Dude shades and bathrobes. Seriously, a few did wear bathrobes. And I'm sure they can recite the entire film from memory. Then you had more casual fans like me. And I could tell there were some folks in the crowd who'd never seen it before. I almost envy them. What's more, the ArcLight put the film in their 21+ auditorium, which is right next to their balcony bar. Yes, that's right. You can get drinks at the bar and bring them into the theater. If you're a Dude fan, then it should be no surprise that I got myself a White Russian ("Can I get another Caucasian, Gary?"). And I got a box of Goobers to go with it, the closest I could get to beer nuts.

The next time I saw Lebowski was at the Egyptian Theatre in Hollywood. The nonprofit that runs the Egyptian, American Cinemateque, put on a tenth anniversary screening of it in March of 2008. They had a couple actors from the film, including James G. Hoosier, who played Liam, Jesus's bowling partner who's perhaps most famous for the slo-mo belly shake at the beginning of the film. He actually stayed and watched the film up in the top row just a few seats down from me. Pretty cool.

Anyway, at this point I was a pretty huge Dude fan. But I'd never been to a Lebowski Fest. I didn't even know about them until last March when it was advertised in one of my weekly concert e-mails from Live Nation. They own the Wiltern Theatre in L.A., which is where the Lebowski Fest L.A. was put on. Yes, I need to qualify "Lebowski Fest" with "L.A." because they have these things all over the country now. It started in Louisville, Kentucky back in 2002 and has since tied the country together like the Dude's rug does his apartment.

It's a two-day affair. On day one they show the film in a concert venue where people from the film show up and there's a lot of pre-show stuff. And then day two's at a bowling alley. Lebowski Fest L.A. took place a week ago Thursday and Friday (May 7 and 8). While I went to the screening on the 7th, I skipped the bowling party the next day, mainly because it was at some bowling alley way the hell down in Lakewood or something. And it was at two in the afternoon. I like the Dude and all, but not enough to take a vacation day to sit in traffic. That's okay. There's plenty to talk about from the first night.

It had been awhile since I went to the Wiltern. Again, it's normally a concert venue. I've been there to see folks like Death Cab for Cutie and Rilo Kiley. I can't remember the last time I was there. Maybe it was Rilo Kiley back in 200.....6 maybe? It was on Father's Day, I remember that. Feist was the opening act, and someone from the audience gave her their cell so she could call her dad right there on stage. Anyway, any excuse to go to the Wiltern is a good one. It's in this beautifully restored Art Deco building in L.A.'s Mid Wilshire district, conveniently accessible by subway from the Valley.

The huge lobby had a bunch of stuff going on. All along the left side were a good two or three bars. And get this: The barkeeps were dressed up as characters from the film. The one who served me my Caucasian was all decked out like Jesus, complete with purple bowling jumpsuit and black hairnet. Over on the right you had the souvenir counter, and finally a snack window by the corridor leading to the auditorium entrances. I saw on the Lebowski Fest site that this was the first L.A. Fest in two years. I sure hope they don't take another year off, but just in case they do, I had to get myself a T-shirt. They had several, some with quotes from the film, others that were bowling shirts. It was tough to choose, but in the end I opted for the one with the Festival logo on the back with this quote from the film on the front: "Ever Thus to Deadbeats, Lebowski." They also had a whole slew of bumper stickers with various quotes. I asked for two ("Careful, man, there's a beverage here!" and "This aggression will not stand, man!"), but the woman behind the counter said that if I bought them, I'd have to leave. Huh? I should've asked what the logic was behind that. Maybe they were afraid people would buy them and plaster the seats and walls with them. Search me. Anyway, she said I should wait until I was leaving before stopping by. When I did leave a few hours later, I was pretty hammered on White Russians, but not enough to forget about these Dude tokens. They're now proudly adorning the outside wall of my cubicle.

I had a good two or so Caucasians while walking around the Wiltern. It's a huge place, like those old restored theaters downtown where I see the L.A. Conservancy screenings every summer (see my Last Remaining Seats posts from June and July of last year; I'll have more this year). No kidding, these old movie palaces really are palaces. We're talking three or four floors.

More fascinating than the theater on this night were the people, a good many of whom were hardcore Lebowski fans. Forget about that screening at the ArcLight. Here you had people decked out as the Dude, Jesus, the German nihilists, the elder Lebowski in a wheelchair. You name it. Seriously, pick any character from the film, no matter how minor or peripheral, and someone was there dressed up as them. Or hardly dressed at all, as was the case with the Bunny fans.

Anyway, so I wandered around and nursed Caucasians before finally going back down to the first floor and entering the auditorium from the back right. The first level of the auditorium had two bars at the back on either side. I didn't pay enough to get a seat toward the front. The back half of the floor had plenty of standing room, though. I sort of parked myself by the bar at the back right and stayed there for the remainder of the night. And I had far too many Caucasians, as you'll see later. I should've eaten something beforehand. Caucasians on an empty stomach: You're just asking for it.

They had all kinds of pre-show stuff. We're talking a good two hours' worth or so. Perhaps the most intriguing act was this five-year-old kid from Japan who played electric guitar. Yes, you read that right. And he's in the Guinness Book of World Records for being the World's Youngest Rock Star or something. I'm not sure if that's the official record, but I think so. He had a full band (of adults) backing him up, and he just stood up at the mic and rocked away for at least a half-hour or so. He sang, but his guitar drowned him out. I couldn't tell if he was singing in English or Japanese. No matter. The entire sellout crowd of two thousand was more than into it. I was enjoying a good Caucasian buzz, which helped. Who cared what the kid was saying? Little dude was jamming.

And then after that, some host guy came out and introduced a bunch of the supporting players from the film. And each one reproduced their signature gesture from the film. Like that guy I saw at the Egyptian last year who played Liam, James G. Hoosier. Yes, he did the belly shake on stage. And in slow motion. You also had Philip Moon, the guy who played Wu, who pissed on the Dude's rug and thus set in motion the whole wild chain of events. What do you think he did on stage? Yes, you know it. He pissed on a rug. I'm not kidding! They put out this rug like the one from the film. Phil turned his back to the audience and took a leak right on it.

Let's see, who else? You had Peter Siragusa, who plays Gary, the bowling alley bartender. It's funny, you never really see him in the film. One scene he hands the Dude a Caucasian, and his left arm protrudes into the screen briefly as he does so. Apparently people wanted to see that reproduced because when Peter was onstage, he pretended like he was serving a drink with his left hand. The crowd went wild. Don't ask.

That cute blonde from the beginning when the Dude buys milk at Ralphs was also there. Her name's Robin Jones. She's officially credited in the film as "checkout girl" or something. Actually I take that back. She's not credited at all, but that's how they plugged her on the Fest's website. I have to say she's adorable. Her big thing in the film is to smack her gum and blow a bubble while the Dude shows up to pay for his milk. What do you think she did on stage? Do I really need to say it?

As it turns out, Robin's got a twin. I'm not sure, but there's a whole backstory there. I think they're from Canada or something. What was cool was that I got to flirt with her at the bar. While Robin was wearing her Ralphs getup, complete with the red apron, her sister was decked out in a turquoise evening dress. She was approached by some guys who wanted her picture and then flirted with her. Meanwhile, Robin was left alone, and I chatted with her for a good ten minutes or so. Had I been sober, I'm not sure I would've had the nerve. But by this time, dear reader, I'd had a few Caucasians and at least one beer. Again, I hadn't eaten anything since lunch, so I was feeling it. But I was still coherent. Robin was asking me questions, like was this my first Lebowski Fest and so on. She explained the whole Fest to me and how she goes to all of them. And she also told me this was the first time they'd done it at the Wiltern. The one two years ago was at the Knitting Factory, which is a cool venue and all but much smaller.

One thing I didn't know until a year or two ago was that the Dude's based on a real person. He's an agent for movie producers (producer's rep as they say) named Jeff Dowd. Well, he was there too. And they didn't just invite him up for five seconds like the other guests. They left him on the stage by himself so he could give a spiel, but I'm not sure about what because he seemed pretty stoned. I do remember him saying that he'd gotten his act together and that he was ready for a fresh start. Or something like that. Get this, though: The whole crowd booed him off the stage. I may be a Fest rookie, but I have a feeling this is sort of a ritual. Jeff Dowd comes up on stage and mumbles and rambles until getting the boot. Later on, while the movie was playing, I caught sight of him wandering through the crowd, drink in hand (I couldn't tell if it was a White Russian), and saying hi to everyone. He seemed very happy and very drunk.

I've heard that Jeff Bridges has been at past Fests, but he couldn't make it to this one. I can't say I'm surprised. Dude's in everything. How could he have the time? No matter. He did, however, have the time to record a video message that they played on the big screen. It was hilarious. They pretended it was a live satellite feed. It was all fuzzy at first. And then it cleared. And we're looking at the back of someone who's sitting at a desk with their head down, as if passed out. You couldn't tell it was Jeff Bridges. But then he "wakes up" and turns around to the screen. Yes, we all cheered, partly because he was all decked out in Dudewear. Not the robe. It was that beige sweater. And his hair and beard were styled like in the movie, only noticeably grayer. He had a Caucasian in hand with a little straw that he sucked on while apologizing for not making the Fest. And then just before signing off--this might be my favorite moment of the whole night--he put on his helmet from Tron. If the crowd wasn't going nuts before, they were now. Come on, how cool is that? In one drunken gesture Jeff Bridges combined two of his most popular characters.

The Wiltern had opened the doors at eight, and it was past ten o'clock when the movie finally started. I was thoroughly drunk. And, I'm ashamed to say, I was flirting somewhat shamelessly with the Latina barkeep. In fact, I was more interested in talking to her than watching the movie. Awful, I know. What's more, I didn't even stay for the whole movie. Partly that was because I had no choice. The subways stop running at midnight. But also, quite frankly, I was tanked and needed to get home, stat, before getting myself in trouble.

I scooped up the two bumper stickers I tried to get earlier. It was hilarious. The guy behind the counter (where'd that cute gal go?) gave me the bumper stickers and immediately said, kind of gruffly too, that I had to leave at once. Seriously, I think he was kind of mad. It can't've been because of me because I hadn't done anything. Maybe other customers had given him shit. Who knows? I got a hotdog from that snack window, trying in vain to soak up some of the booze, but it was all in vain.

I went across the street to the subway stop just in time for the 11:45pm train. I was so hammered that when the train showed up, I wasn't sure if I should get on it. My drunkenness made me think I was at a stop with multiple trains when, in fact, it was the end of the line and there was only one direction to go. The two sheriff's deputies patrolling the platform no doubt could tell I was tanked because they were fucking furious as they told me to get on the train. As for my stop, it's at the other end of the line, in North Hollywood. Thank Christ it is the last stop because I passed out on the way. All the people getting off woke me up. I would've missed my stop!

No matter. Lesson learned. I had a great time. Only next time, remind me to have dinner beforehand. And not hit on any barkeeps. And maybe I should drive. That'll keep me from drinking so much, and I can stay the whole length of the movie.